Baby Steps

Today was one of those days.

If I had a nickle for every time I asked a first grader to sit on his pockets, put a bubble in her mouth, or listen while Ms. Berg is talking, I'd retire tomorrow. My kids were in perpetual motion. I looked at my line while walking back from lunch and I had three kids moonwalking, one jumping in place, and two engaged in a shoving match. The rest were looking anywhere but in front of them, weaving back and forth down the sidewalk. My class was a motley crew today and we looked the part. I started making a list of new careers in my head as I tried to accomplish the nearly impossible task of getting my scholars situated in their desks after lunch. I'd gladly take the job of brain surgeon after being responsible for the well-being of 19 wiggly first grades. Bring it on :)

Although today was full of frustration, there was one glimmering bright spot that left me smiling. During our reading lesson, my students were unsucessfully following Superstar Scholar Rule #4: Listen while your teacher is talking. We had two minutes of "Think Time" to brainstorm solutions to our problem. While sharing out, Kaliah stood behind her desk and delivered this passionate speech in an abnormally loud first grade stutter:

"Children (Yes, my first graders call each other children) y'all know how to be good. I know you have a heart inside you. Think deep inside and find it. You want Ms. Berg to be happy. You're Superstar Scholar's and y'all know how to make gooder choices. You know that we need to show Ms. Berg respect and treat her how we want to be treated. If y'all are talking while Ms. Berg is talking we can't learn and our brains won't grow. Y'all got to start listening and making better choices."

Thank you, Kaliah for reminding me why I'm here.

On days like today I wonder if anything I'm saying sinks in. I literally feel like I'm beating my head against the wall when I look out and see 75% of my class lost in another world far away from our classroom. I feel like I'm wasting my time until a Kaliah opens his or her mouth and reminds me in their own words that something is getting through. My kids didn't come to school knowing how to treat each other. Their idea of conflict resolution is punching the other person until they shut up. They are slowly beginning to understand that hitting doesn't accomplish anything, and being a good problem solver is a lot more effective in our classroom. When asked what a good choice was at the beginning of the year, they responded "Be good." Now they can answer, "Keep my hands to myself on the carpet. Treat my friends like I want to be treated. Keep a bubble in my mouth when I standing in line so I can help other classes learn by staying quiet." Little by little, piece by piece, we'll get there. I can't wait to see my scholars at the end of the year. Until then, I'll keep up the head banging until progress is made.